My give-a-damn's busted.

I'm finding it hard to care about anyone but myself. Keep in mind, though, that my professional and personal lives are very separate. I have no problem doing my job and doing it well. In my personally life, however, I find myself whispering in my head several times per day "I don't care...". I don't care about Obamacare. I am not wasting my time and precious energy on thinking about how much its going to screw me in the long run. I don't care about what's going on in the world. I barely have the energy or motivation to deal with my own screwed up world. I'm not about to dedicate my time to trying to pretend I have the answers to all of the world's problems. I don't care that my favorite scratch off lottery ticket is $5 and I play it like twice a week. I don't care how bad you think your life is. Right now, I'm the wrong person to pick if you want to bitch and moan about your life. Had a bad day at work? Me too. Had a crappy supper? Me too. Husband being an asshole and won't clean up after himself? Me t....oh wait. You don't know this level of lonely, nor would I wish it upon anyone. This isn't a divorce. This isn't an affair. I had no control or input in this decision. I didn't have a say-so in what happened. This isn't a consequence of poor decision making. This isn't a 'lesson learned' moment. I didn't do anything. I don't care that I'm angry, and I especially don't care that you are uncomfortable with it. I'm going to be angry as long as I want to be. That might mean 3 days, 3 weeks, or 3 minutes. Suck it up.

I need a massage.